Things Mama Taught Me: "Be Nice"

Being nice is not all that easy for a kid—or for a grownup either.

First of all, what is "nice"? It's not very specific. Actually, what it meant when I was young was something like, "Stop fussing with your brothers." "Don't tease your little sister." "You mustn't shut the kittens up in that box." As a grownup, then, could I assume being nice means speaking courteously to the bank teller, tipping well at the restaurant, and feeding the squirrels and birds? All of these actions are "nice," but is it enough to do nice things? We could very well be merely acting nice, and not being nice at all. Like the rich young man who had kept the commandments from his childhood, we could bolster our self-esteem with outward compliance and lack the one vital thing: an involvement of our heart. (See Matthew 19:16-22)

Without meaning to, we do sometimes attempt to carry the idea of "niceness" over into our faith life. "I go to church every week," we think. "I support the church and community charities, I don't get drunk, I don't even gossip—am I not a 'nice' Christian?" But one thing is worrisome: How much nice is enough? Would you really want to base your relationship to God on how nicely you can behave, or risk your eternal well-being on your personal niceness rather than the righteousness of Christ? Jesus had stern words for a group of people who had acted nice, but did not keep the law of love. “Not everyone who calls out to me, ‘Lord! Lord!’ will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter. On judgment day many will say to me, ‘Lord! Lord! We prophesied in your name and cast out demons in your name and performed many miracles in your name.’ But I will reply, ‘I never knew you. Get away from me, you who break God’s laws.’ " (Matthew 7:21-23)

I appreciate my mother's efforts to train me properly; she did instill a few social graces in me. But I'm glad I know that my "niceness" is not how God measures me. He looks to see if the love of Christ is growing in me.

MaryMartha
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Scripture quotations are taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com