Things Mama Taught Me: "We'll See"

My flawlessly honest mother was very careful about keeping her promises, even to us children. So it follows that she had to be very careful about making promises. I’ll admit that we pushed the limit pretty hard, trying to extract some word of certainty from her. “Can we go to Grandma’s house this weekend? Can we? Can we?” “Can I have a camera for Christmas? Can I, please?” “Can Marlene spend the night?” “Can Daddy bring home some pop?” “Can I . . . Can we . . . ?” And my mother would answer calmly, “We’ll see.”

Had she said, “Hmm . . . maybe,” or “Well, I think so . . .” one of us likely would have whined later when our hopes did not materialize, “But you promised!” That little bit of hesitation, that holding out of slim hope surely was meant to be a promise, wasn’t it? But “We’ll see,” meant just that: When the time comes, we will see then what we will see! Maybe you will have what you want, maybe not. Right now, I don’t know, so you will just have to wait, because I am not going to be trapped into making a “promise” I will eventually not be able to keep.

I’ve been thinking about the waiting that Christians do, looking toward “the end of all things.” We know some things: we will be with our Lord, and we will be with a host of others who love Him too, but there are a lot of things we just don’t know. We will have to wait and see. Unlike my mother’s carefulness not to promise, God has given us great and precious promises, and unlike the uncertainty of our childish hopes being fulfilled, God has planned for us fullness of joy.

“We’ll see.” Truly, and with full understanding at last, we’ll see!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Two Brave Queens: Vashti and Esther

Almost every Sunday School child knows the story of Queen Esther, and how she bravely faced King Ahasureus (Xerxes, reigning from 486-465 B.C.) in order to spare the lives of her people, the Jews. When we’re young, we’re not told the whole story, really, because of some of its “adult content”!

In the third year of Ahasureus’s reign, he gave a sumptuous banquet for his military officers and the nobles and princes of the 127 provinces he ruled. For six months, he displayed the opulent wealth of his empire and his personal splendor. When that was over, he gave another banquet for all the people (men), great and small, in the courtyard of the palace. The garden was decorated extravagantly, with gold and silver couches arranged on a mosaic pavement of costly stones. Drinks were served in golden goblets, and the royal wine flowed freely, for the King had instructed his palace staff to serve each man as much as he wanted. And this feasting and drinking went on for a week!

Meanwhile, in the palace, Queen Vashti, the reigning queen, was hostess at a banquet for all the women. I am intrigued by Vashti’s story, although we are given the barest of details. We don’t know what the women drank—Kool-Aid maybe? I think they were not drinking a great deal of wine, because Vashti still had her wits about her, completely, as we shall see. On the seventh day, the King, in high spirits because of the wine, (he was just plain drunk!) sent seven of his attendants to call Queen Vashti. She must come to the King’s feast, wearing her royal crown which would signal to all who she was—and to whom she belonged. He wanted the nobles and all the other men to gaze on her beauty because she was a very lovely woman. Imagine! Several hundred drunken men ogling one beautiful woman—and who knows what other lascivious behavior would have ensued.

But Vashti refused! The King was furious. He consulted with his accustomed counselors who knew all the laws and customs. “What should be done to Queen Vashti?” he demanded. What penalty does the law provide for a queen who dares to refuse the King’s orders?”

One of the wise men answered, "It's not only the king Queen Vashti has insulted, it's all of us, leaders and people alike in every last one of King Xerxes' provinces. The word's going to get out: 'Did you hear the latest about Queen Vashti? King Xerxes ordered her to be brought before him and she wouldn't do it!' When the women hear it, they'll start treating their husbands with contempt. The day the wives of the Persian and Mede officials get wind of the queen's insolence, they'll be out of control. Is that what we want, a country of angry women who don't know their place?

"So, if the king agrees, let him pronounce a royal ruling and have it recorded in the laws of the Persians and Medes so that it cannot be revoked, that Vashti is permanently banned from King Xerxes' presence. And then let the king give her royal position to a woman who knows her place. When the king's ruling becomes public knowledge throughout the kingdom, extensive as it is, every woman, regardless of her social position, will show proper respect to her husband.’ The king and the princes liked this. The king did what [the counselor] proposed. He sent bulletins to every part of the kingdom, to each province in its own script, to each people in their own language: ‘Every man is master of his own house; whatever he says, goes.’ " (Esther 1:16-22)

After the King had calmed down a bit, he began to have second thoughts about the beautiful Vashti and what he had ordered. Since the ruling could not be rescinded, the King’s young attendants suggested that a search be conducted throughout the kingdom to bring every beautiful young virgin to the royal harem. There they would all be given twelve months of beauty treatments, and after that, the young woman who most pleased the King would be made queen, replacing Vashti. Each young woman in turn was to spend one night with the King, thus becoming a “secondary wife” who could not marry any other man. She must live as a recluse unless the King specifically sent for her again. And that is how Esther became the queen, for she had a lovely figure and beautiful face, which naturally pleased the lustful king.

Read the whole story of Queen Esther again; she was indeed very brave. She said, “I will,” and risked her life. I will go in to the King although he hasn’t sent for me. I will expose the wicked man who has plotted against my people. I will stand up for my Uncle Mordecai who has taken me as his own daughter. I will find a way to save my people. “And if I perish, I perish.” But Vashti too was enormously courageous. She said, ”I will not,” and lost her throne. We never hear of her in Scripture again.

Probably Vashti was not a believer in the God of Israel, but she was a woman who had the moral strength to tell her evil husband “no.” In those days, women—even queens— did not tell their husbands what they would or would not do, especially not with a whole empire of subjugated women watching. But Vashti did not let fear prevent her from doing right. And for that, I have to admire her.

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture taken from THE MESSAGE. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Good for One Friend

Usually coupons that arrive in my mailbox are good for one large drink FREE! when I buy the advertised sandwich, or good for balancing my tires FREE! when I buy a couple of new ones. The other day I received a coupon: GOOD FOR ONE FRIEND. Well, I thought, that’s a novel idea! Of course, I soon realized that the advertiser wanted me to pass the coupon on to a friend who would subscribe to their magazine.

But isn’t that a great idea! I thought about the kind of friend I might like to get with my coupon:

A friend who prays with/for me.
A friend who understands and accepts who I am.
A friend who listens.
A friend who doesn’t always agree with me
    (and challenges “sloppy” thinking)!
A friend who gives honest and wise counsel.
A friend who can talk intelligently about something he/she has read.
A friend who likes to eat out at the same places I do!
A friend who enjoys the music I do (when we’re together).
A friend who likes to have a “play day” once in awhile.
A friend who can share a laugh.
A friend who encourages me when I try something new
     and applauds me whether I succeed or not.)
A friend who knows the song in my heart
     and sings it to me when I can’t remember.

As you’ve probably guessed, I have these friends. How blessed I am! Some of these relationships have developed over a long period of time and are among my greatest treasures. Others are newer but are becoming rich and deep. Some are friends that I see often; some, regrettably, are far away. Thanks, every one of you!

The point I am making with the coupon deal is something you already know: That is not how friends are acquired. True friendships are formed by a bonding process, a tying together that happens as life happens to you and to them. The Wisdom Writer implies seeking out those ties. “By yourself you're unprotected. With a friend you can face the worst. Can you round up a third? A three-stranded rope isn't easily snapped. (Ecclesiastes 4:12) Some of the qualities listed above may be the gentle ties that hold you to the friends you love, or there may be other values and characteristics that are more important to you. Either way, I wish for you the joy of relationship with a friend who “loves at all times.” No coupon required.

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

The Courage to Grieve

One of my blogging friends wrote something a couple of weeks ago that I have been pondering ever since. She used the words, “the courage to grieve,” and I have not been able to escape their personal implication. I have had some significant losses in my lifetime: a marriage, my parents, a brother, a grandbaby, a husband, some dreams. I think I have grieved appropriately in each case—differently, of course, but even today in ways that are still suited to the loss.

What I have not known until recent months is that there are some “deaths” I have not even recognized, let alone suitably grieved. Doing so takes courage, because I have to admit that parts of me were allowed to “die” when I was very young. That is no one’s fault in particular, certainly not my parents’ since the only way they knew to raise me was the way they had been raised. That was fairly uncomplicated: you fed and clothed the children and kept a roof over their heads, you bandaged them if they were bleeding, you saw to it that they learned to work and to read, and you took them with you to Sunday School and worship.

I am very grateful for all I was given; it is no small thing to have raised a big family during the Depression and war years. Given their economic situation, education, and religious culture, my parents certainly provided us with every advantage they knew how to supply. William Hodding Carter, Jr., a prominent journalist in the twentieth century, said, “There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children. One of these is roots; the other, wings.” (Someone has rephrased it a bit to make it memorable as a rhyme: You can give your children but two things, one is roots and the other wings.) My parents gave us impressively strong roots. I felt safe and provided for; we were probably poor, but I didn’t know that! I readily absorbed our cultural and religious values. I learned early to take a lot of responsibility.

While they gave us sturdy roots, they didn’t know anything about giving your children “wings.” I absolutely believe that I was loved, but I never felt that I was valued. I was obedient, smart, and creative, but my mother never said, “I am proud of you.” Photos show a sweet little girl with dark eyes and long curls, but my father never told me, “Honey, you are so pretty.” They did not encourage me to find out how to do what I really love doing. They didn’t help me learn how to make good decisions—and live with the results. They did not give me the freedom to make mistakes or teach me to enjoy my successes.

You must not think this is an indictment against my parents. They did not nurture me well because they did not know how. No one had built self-confidence in them. No one had appreciated and guided them. No one had encouraged them to discover their gifts. No one had helped them find a sense of purpose and a passion for life. I have hesitated a long time to even write these things about them, but I am doing so because there may be some of my readers who will think, “Yes, I know what she’s talking about. I lost something back there too. I am grieving the loss of— “ Maybe innocence. Maybe faith or self-confidence, security or privacy. Maybe enough to eat. Maybe a dozen things. Or only one that really, really matters.

It is not dishonoring to those who brought us up to look honestly at the job they did. Evaluating it does not mean forgetting what we hold precious, but may mean taking a more clear-eyed view. We can be truly thankful (or not) for our heritage, but that does not eliminate the “holes” from those early years—and nearly everybody has them. Few people had a perfect childhood and youth, and so there are many of us who have empty places inside that never were filled up sufficiently. We may try to ignore these places, or scold ourselves for being silly enough to re-visit the distant past. “Those things don’t matter now,” we tell ourselves.

But they do matter. That is one of the reasons why some of us find ourselves so conflicted about who we are presently. We did not know who we were back then. Grieving for something that is missing—either lost or never was—is a way of acknowledging that the long-ago nurture was something valuable and precious to us. That’s why it takes courage to grieve; it says that we are quite vulnerable and not ashamed to admit it. Grieving for these losses in an appropriate way has an amazing power to heal.

So what would be appropriate grieving? Whatever is appropriate for other kinds of losses. Talk to someone. Cry if it makes you feel better. Pound on something (but not people). Keep a journal or write a letter. Read. Rest. Exercise. Sit in the sun. Treat yourself kindly. After awhile my process of grieving has yielded new understanding and new growth toward wholeness. If you need to grieve some early losses, so will yours.

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

My thanks to Kimberly George who writes an inter-generational dialogue with another member of the Evangelical and Ecumenical Women’s Caucus, an international organization of women and men who believe that the Bible supports the equality of the sexes. The particular post I refer to is located at: http://eewc.com/72-27/2008/10/15/remembering-grieving-and-the-pursuit-of-wholeness/

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Autumn Colors and Others

Although the Midwest does not have the glorious colors on the trees that some other parts of the country have, I have been enjoying October immensely. As I drive around the city, I've had fun trying to come up with as many names as possible to describe the colors I see, without naming other similar things, i.e. buttercup yellow or pine green.

Yellow—golden, sunny, cadmium yellow, and ocher
Orange—rust, and copper
Red—scarlet, crimson, burgundy, cerise, and vermilion
Brown—tan, beige, sepia, henna, umber, russet, puce, and sienna
And of course, there is still some green—chartreuse, kelly, emerald, and celadon

OK, I admit I looked up some of these! (I’m still learning.) But I did not make up any!

When I was in grade school, I had a treasured box of 16 crayons, without fancy names. There was yellow, yellow-orange, orange, red-orange, red, purple, etc. I knew just exactly what to look for. Do you recognize these Crayolas, new this year? What’s a kid to do when the teacher says “Color the tree trunk brown?” (Answers below.)

     1. Bear Hug
     2. Fun in the Sun
     3. Best Friends
     4. Happy Ever After
     5. Giving Tree
     6. Awesome
     7. Super Happy
     8. Famous

Seriously, what a beautiful, colorful world we live in!

Key to the colors above
     1. a dark brown
     2. the old orange-red
     3. orchid
     4. turquoise blue
     5. a very bright green
     6. “watermelon” red
     7. ultra-bright yellow
     8. hot magenta (I’d call it “hot pink”)

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

"Be Still and Know That I Am God"

I am the God of the storm.
I created thunder and lightning, wind and rain.
My feet are planted on the dark clouds

     that are rolling into your life,

     threatening to engulf you.
Even though your grasp slips from the guide wheel
     and you find the anchor about to come loose and set you adrift,
I am there, controlling the height of the waves

     and the fierceness of the wind.
I will not permit them to dash you upon the rocks.

I am the God of the darkness.
I created night and day; they are alike to Me.
My eyes pierce through the inky blackness

     that surrounds you so thickly you can feel it press

     the very breath from you.
In that darkness, be still—
The heartbeat that you hear is Mine.

I am the God of emptiness.
I created the vast reach of space out beyond
     the little planet that is familiar to you,
And I know that it is far from empty.
I inhabit the aching emptiness of your longings,
     your unfulfilled dreams,
     the rising and falling of your hopes.
Your emptiness is pregnant with what is yet to be,
For I spoke, and out of the emptiness
     there came into being all that is.
One day again, I will speak.
                                                         —MM
MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Things Mama Taught Me: Give Back to God

I’m not sure my parents ever explained to me just why we put money in the offering plate at church. I don’t remember any rules about giving: to whom, how much, and how often. We gave pennies in the special birthday offering, according to the years of our age. We gave nickels and dimes in Sunday School, and my parents put bills in the offering plate in “big church.” I knew it all went to God, but I don’t think I ever thought about why He would want it! Now I understand that there are some very good reasons for giving found in Scripture, and a number of them turn out to be for my benefit!

-- Giving lays up treasure in heaven. Writing to his young colleague Timothy, the Apostle Paul said, “Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life.” (I Timothy 6:18, 19 NIV). Jesus taught the same thing in His ministry. Speaking to a rich young man who was seeking eternal life, He said, “There is still one thing you haven’t done. . . Go and sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” (Mark 10:21 NLT) I confess I don’t know exactly how this “sending stuff ahead” works, but since we cannot take it with us anyway when we depart this world, it makes sense to invest it in eternity!

-- Giving is the ultimate safe investment. "Don't hoard treasure down here where it gets eaten by moths and corroded by rust or—worse!—stolen by burglars. Stockpile treasure in heaven, where it's safe from moth and rust and burglars. It's obvious, isn't it? The place where your treasure is, is the place you will most want to be, and end up being.” (Matthew 6:19-21 MSG)

-- Giving assures an earthly return as well. “Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full—pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.” (Luke 6:38 NLT) One of the powerful lessons I have learned in my maturing years as a Christian is that the return may not be from the person(s) who benefited from my gift. I kept expecting gratitude and the overflowing “lap” from the same source and it seldom, if ever, came. I expected the return to be in kind too, but that did not often happen either. God promises a return, but He is in charge of what and how and when! A second part of the same lesson is as familiar to us as the principle of planting and harvesting. What I give is enlarged, and what I get back is greater than I gave—although, again, it may not be of the same sort.

-- Giving is a way of encouraging another’s efforts, supporting them in what they are doing for God and good. “How I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me again. I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn’t have the chance to help me. Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. At the moment I have all I need—and more! I am generously supplied with the gifts you sent me with Epaphroditus. They are a sweet-smelling sacrifice that is acceptable and pleasing to God.” (Philippians 4:10-11, 18 NLT)

-- Giving reflects my trustworthiness in spiritual matters. “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities. And if you are untrustworthy about worldly wealth, who will trust you with the true riches of heaven?” (Luke 16:10-11 NLT

-- Giving acknowledges God as my source and shows my gratitude. As long as there have been people on the earth, they have been bringing gifts to God. One beautiful expression is recorded in the Old Testament. “When you enter the land the Lord your God is giving you as a special possession and you have conquered it and settled there, put some of the first produce from each crop you harvest into a basket and bring it to the designated place of worship—the place the Lord your God chooses for his name to be honored. Go to the priest in charge at that time and say to him, ‘With this gift I acknowledge to the Lord your God that I have entered the land he swore to our ancestors he would give us’ . . . He brought us to this place and gave us this land flowing with milk and honey! And now, O Lord, I have brought you the first portion of the harvest you have given me from the ground.’ Then place the produce before the Lord your God, and bow to the ground in worship before him.” (Deuteronomy 26:1-4, 9, 10 NLT)

-- Giving brings honor to God. “Now he who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will also supply and increase your store of seed and will enlarge the harvest of your righteousness. You will be made rich [enriched] in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God. This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of God's people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God.” (II Corinthians 9:10-12 NIV)

-- Giving is received by God Himself, even though we have offered it to meet a human need. When God sorts out rewards for those entering the heavenly Kingdom, He tells some, “I was hungry and you fed me, I was thirsty and you gave me a drink, I was homeless and you gave me a room, I was shivering and you gave me clothes, I was sick and you stopped to visit, I was in prison and you came to me.” They object, having never done those deeds. “Then the King will say, 'I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me.' “ (Matthew 25:35-36, 40 MSG)

The nature of God Himself is to give. Give—and watch what happens!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked MSG are taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Measure Twice and Saw Once

“Measure twice and saw once” was what my dad or some other wise person told me as they observed my efforts on a repair project. The meaning is clear. I cannot put back a piece I have removed. If I’ve changed my mind, or I sawed off too much and now neither section is workable—well, I should have exercised just a little more care before I started wielding that saw.
Thinking about that old adage, I realized how like another it is: “Think twice before you speak.” This is perhaps even more familiar than the one about measuring, but to me it is not as descriptive. Sure, we know we are supposed to think about what we’re saying, but drawing the parallel between speaking and sawing may give us a better picture of just how important that thoughtfulness is. We can’t really take back spoken words any more than we can re-attach the piece of board that we sawed off and now wish we hadn’t!

“Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.” (Colossians 4:6) Satisfying relationships and productive lives are not achieved without some thoughtful attention to our speech. Maybe this can help guide us: “Measure twice and saw once.”

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotation is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Flying Backwards

Hummingbirds can fly backwards, the only group of birds that can. They are also able to fly upside down, although that’s not their usual mode. We too have achieved this with helicopters that can easily fly backwards, and one model that can fly upside down; however, that is a risky maneuver reserved for air shows or extreme rescues.

We ordinary people don’t do the backwards and upside down moves, at least not literally. We do them very subtly, without even realizing we need to “straighten up and fly right.” (Something my father told us often! It is the name of a Nat King Cole song, but I have no idea if that’s where my father got the expression.) We are sometimes upside down and backwards when it comes to understanding our own feelings and also interpreting the intentions of others toward us. I am not going to attempt extensive definitions, but simply make some observations and you can see if you recognize any of them.

We mistake intelligence for reason. (One can be ever so smart and not have “a lick of common sense.”)

We substitute superstition and bargaining for faith.

We become infatuated and call it “love.” (Love will be intent on giving rather than getting.)

We confuse fear with painfully learned caution.

We suffer shame instead of guilt. (Shame attacks who I am; guilt focuses on something I did for which I can ask forgiveness.)

We mis-read control as caring. (Genuine consideration does not manipulate.)

We seek vengeance in the name of justice.

We assign blame instead of responsibility. (It doesn’t always matter whose “fault” the problem is; we can probably help solve it.)

We give ourselves to urgent matters rather than to important ones.

We hide the lust to possess by calling it need.

We go for clever suggestions rather than visionary ideas.

We satisfy ourselves with slogans instead of principles.

We scatter verbiage everywhere and consider ourselves great communicators.

We determine to win even if we have to sacrifice truth.

We choose being “right” over being honest.

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

What Three Young Men Learned about Freedom

Daniel and three other young men, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah, were among the Hebrew people who were deported from their homeland around 605 B.C. We remember Daniel by his given name, but we know the others best by their Babylonian names: Shadrach, Meschach, and Abednego. A number of young Jewish men, including even nobles and royal descendants, were selected for a special program of preparation to serve in King Nebuchadnezzar’s palace. All were healthy, good-looking, and intelligent. Daniel and his companions, probably all mere teenagers, decided from the beginning that they would remain faithful to their God even though they were captives. Eventually, they were above all the others in their physical fitness, their knowledge of the culture, and their wisdom and understanding. After Daniel was enabled by the Lord to interpret a dream for the king, the four young were appointed to high positions in the realm.

King Nebuchadnezzar was a man of monstrous ego. He had a golden image erected, ninety feet tall, and ordered “everybody who was anybody” to come to its dedication. When all were gathered, a herald announced, “As soon as you hear the musical instruments playing, you must bow down and worship the image that the King has set up. Anyone who does not kneel and worship will be thrown into a blazing fiery furnace."

The band began to play and all the people bowed down—almost all the people. Daniel’s three young friends did not. (Apparently Daniel was elsewhere in the province when this occurred.) Some Babylonian fortunetellers stepped up—perhaps those who had not been able to understand the King’s dream—and reported to the King that three young Jews, the very men he had placed in high positions,were ignoring his command. The King flew into a rage and ordered them to be brought to him. “If you do not obey,” he warned them, “you will be immediately thrown into the roaring furnace. Then who is the god who can rescue you?”

The group answered, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God whom we serve is able to save us. He will rescue us from your power, Your Majesty. But even if he doesn’t, we want to make it clear to you, Your Majesty, that we will never serve your gods or worship the gold statue you have set up.” (Daniel 3:16-18 *) This made the king so angry that he had the furnace heated seven times hotter than usual. He ordered some of his stoutest soldiers to tie up the young men, turbans and all, and throw them into the furnace. The soldiers themselves died from the intense heat, and the three young men, securely tied, fell down into the flames.

Not the end of the story! To his amazement, the King saw not three but four men, loose and walking about in the fire. “And the form of the fourth,” he said “is like the Son of God!” When the young men were pulled out of the furnace, their hair was not singed, their clothes were not scorched, and there was not even the smell of smoke upon them. They were completely free, and were given positions of even greater importance!

But the freedom of these three young men did not actually start when they were released. It began earlier when they declared, “Our God is able . . . He will . . . And even if He doesn’t . . .” It takes some faith to say that God is able to rescue us from a desperate situation. It takes greater faith to declare that we believe He will. It takes abandonment to faith to say, “But even if He doesn’t, I will go on trusting and obeying Him.”

Peace and freedom come when we begin to trust God with our lives. Our freedom and confidence increase as we develop a “history” with Him, and we have experienced His reliability. Our freedom is unassailable when we are able to declare, “If He doesn’t answer the way I would like or even if it seems He doesn’t answer at all, He knows best, and I refuse to stop trusting Him!” I am reminded of our childish retort when someone tried to lord it over us, “You’re not the boss of me!” Although we might not say exactly that, our determination must equally clear-cut. “You’re not big enough to make me stop loving and serving God!” That is a powerful freedom!

What if God had not intervened on behalf of the three young men? What if we ourselves face threats and persecution and even death? Well, the Apostle Paul says we’re better off out of our bodies and in God’s presence. That defines for us the ultimate freedom.

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved

*Read the whole story in the Book of Daniel, chapters 1-3. It will be worth your time!

Scripture quotation is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

In the World of Dick and Jane

I grew up in the world of Dick and Jane—also Baby Sally, Mother, Father, Spot the dog, and Puff the cat. For those of you who are “Boomers” or somewhat older, you probably know who I mean. For those who are younger, let me explain: the above-named are characters in a popular series of basic reading texts for young school children from the 1930s to the 1970s in the United States. The books relied on sight reading (or "whole word reading") and repetition, using phrases like, "Oh, see. Oh, see Jane. Funny, funny Jane." The books enjoyed a revival when they were reprinted in 2003; they are not now considered suitable for teaching children to read, but over 2.5 million copies were sold to nostalgic people like me. Related merchandise, such as shirts and magnets, were also produced and gained wide popularity, particularly among people who had never been exposed to the original series but were familiar with catch phrases such as “See Spot run!"

In the world of Dick and Jane, there was no unemployment, no arguments between one’s parents, no racial tension (characters from other races and cultures were not introduced until 1965), no sick babies or dying pets, no one who stole wagons or tricycles. I loved Dick and Jane and their world! And when I say that I grew up in that world, I am quite serious. My father farmed and so it was obvious to me that he had steady work. (I didn’t know it was making hardly any money.) My mother was, of course, a stay-at-home mom because that’s what mothers did. My parents did not argue—that I could ever tell—mostly because that’s not what mothers did. Until I entered high school, I did not know a single person of another race. (I was in an all-white community.) We had measles and scarlet fever, but nobody was deathly sick. When the pets died, well, they weren’t really part of the family anyway; they just happened to live where we lived. And there was no one around to steal our stuff, as if they would even want it. So I was not really very well-prepared for the reality of life in any other kind of world than the world of Dick and Jane where the worst hurts were usually nothing more than scraped knees and bloody noses.

We no longer live in the world of our earliest childhood experiences—whether it was like Dick and Jane’s and mine, or a milieu totally different. Whatever the setting of our growing up, all of us have undoubtedly faced hardships, disappointments, and certainly surprises! It's just not the way we pictured it!" We may need to be reminded that the world of our early spiritual formation, the world when we went to our first real job, and the world of our honeymoon marriage no longer exists. That world has changed, and so have we. “When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.” (I Corinthians 13:11) We are better and wiser and stronger now.

The world we live in today is complicated, and sometimes frightening. Cutthroat competition, natural disasters, crime, dreadful diseases, war and terrorism exist here. But we will survive and thrive in this world as well. “I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38, 40)

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotations are taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Never Saying "Sorry"

"Love means never having to say you're sorry," is a popular line from the 1970 romance novel/film by Erich Segal. Love Story became the top selling work of fiction for all of 1970 in the United States, and was translated into more than 20 languages. The quotation above is perhaps even more enduring than the book itself. In 2005, the American Film Institute compiled a list of the top 100 movie quotations in American cinema. The "never saying sorry” line was #13.

The quote is often parodied. For example, a character on Rugrats says, “Being bad means never having to say you’re sorry,” and John Lennon is supposed to have said, “Love means having to say you're sorry every fifteen minutes.” Segal’s original meaning of the quote in his novel, “Love is not ever having to say you’re sorry,” is all but forgotten: not being sorry that we (the young couple) had loved and “lost,” not having regrets or blame. In the film, the line is used another time as the husband is about to apologize for his anger. His wife then responds with the famous words about never saying “sorry.”

When I first heard the words used that way, I knew instinctively that they were not true. Are we really so sure of ourselves that we think we are never going to make a mistake, even in a close relationship? (Maybe especially in a close relationship) I am with Lisa of The Simpsons. When the family was watching “Love Story,” and heard Jennifer say that love means never saying “sorry,” Lisa said “No, it doesn’t!” And I’m with the bag-of-rocks music professor (Ryan O’Neal) in “What’s Up, Doc?” who responded with “That’s the dumbest thing I ever heard.”

Part of being mature is being able to recognize when offense has been taken, even if unintended, and being willing to take responsibility for it. Perhaps a simple, humble explanation will help, or perhaps not. Perhaps something can be done to make amends; perhaps not. But at the very least, one should have the respect and courtesy to say, and to mean it, “I am sorry.”

(And by the way, don’t add, “But you . . .”)

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Don't Be Surprised

There are many surprises in the Christian life, for God is infinitely creative in His relationship with us! There are some things, however, that take us by surprise that really shouldn’t if we are careful readers of the Word.

— Don’t be surprised on the insistence that one must be “born again.” A co-worker of mine has a new baby daughter. He is not at all reluctant to tell us that Bridget was born yesterday morning because that’s how she arrived here to participate in human life—she was born. Jesus tried to explain to Nicodemus, a respected Jewish teacher, that if he wanted to participate in the Kingdom of God, he needed to be born a second time. Both kingdoms, the earthly one and the heavenly one, are entered by birth. Jesus told him, “Humans can reproduce only human life, but the Holy Spirit gives birth to spiritual life. So don’t be surprised when I say, ‘You must be born again.’ “ (John 3:6, 7 NLT)

We were meant for the heavenly Kingdom; that was God’s plan all along, so don’t be surprised! Believing that to be true is as natural an expectation as telling an airliner sitting on the runway, “Don’t be surprised that I am expecting you to take off and fly. You were made to fly!”

— Don’t be surprised that Jesus is both Savior and Judge. The Jewish rulers were in an uproar because the Lord had healed a crippled man on the Sabbath. He took this opportunity to declare very openly His connection to the Father. He explained that in “an hour that is coming—and now is—” those who are dead in their sins receive life by hearing (believing) Him. He could give life because He was the Son of God; He was one with God. He also claimed that authority to judge had been given to Him. He could judge because he was the Son of Man; He was one of us. “Don’t be so surprised! Indeed, the time is coming when all the dead in their graves will hear the voice of God’s Son, and they will rise again. Those who have done good will rise to experience eternal life, and those who have continued in evil will rise to experience judgment.” (John 5:25-29 NLT)

— Don’t be surprised at God’s interventions. One afternoon Peter and John went up to the temple to the three o’clock prayer meeting. They were stopped by a crippled beggar who wanted alms, and the disciples gave Him what they had—the life of Jesus Christ! The man got up and went into the temple with them, leaping and praising God. When all the people saw the man whom they knew had been lame from his birth, they were amazed. Peter, seeing that he now had an audience, addressed the crowd. “People of Israel,” he said, “what is so surprising about this? And why stare at us as though we had made this man walk by our own power or godliness? For it is the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob—the God of all our ancestors—who has brought glory to his servant Jesus by doing this.” (Acts 3:12, 13 NLT)

— Don’t be surprised at your difficulties. “Dear friends, don’t be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you. Instead, be very glad—for these trials make you partners with Christ in his suffering, so that you will have the wonderful joy of seeing his glory when it is revealed to all the world.” (I Peter 4:12, 13) Sometimes it is very difficult to wait for the glory, whether at the end of the particular trial or the end of life itself. “Hold on, my child, joy comes in the morning; weeping only lasts for the night. Hold on, my child, joy comes in the morning; the darkest hour means dawn is just in sight.” (Reader, do you know the author?)

— Don’t be surprised when not everyone accepts you. I often hear people lament the restraint or ridicule that Christians face in their workplaces, schools, or communities. Such mild opposition does not even merit the label “persecution” when every day Christians in some parts of the world are losing their lives for the faith. As the writer to the Hebrews cautioned, “In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! So don't feel sorry for yourselves.” (Hebrews 12:4 MSG) Some Christians are angry at those who oppose them, even murderous in their hearts, but “we must not be like Cain, who joined the Evil One and then killed his brother. And why did he kill him? Because he was deep in the practice of evil, while the acts of his brother were righteous. So don't be surprised, friends, when the world hates you. This has been going on a long time.” (I John 3:12, 13 MSG)

So . . . Don’t be too surprised. You’ve been warned!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked MSG are taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Learning to Walk

Think about the different times in your life you’ve had to learn to walk. First as a baby, you took those first few precarious steps. You probably didn’t recognize it as a major milestone, but your family certainly did. As you gained skill, you wanted to jump up on every curb you saw and balance yourself as you walked along. Then later, at a park or in the school gym, you attempted the balance bar, raised a foot or two off the surface. What an adventure learning to walk is!

But that’s not all. There is learning to walk in cowboy/cowgirl boots or as a young lady in her first high heels. You may choose rollerblades, snowshoes or skis, or mountain climbing boots and learn a new gait. At some point, you might even have to use crutches temporarily! All of these experiences require learning to walk in a new way.

We call the Christian life a “walk,” first of all, because it is a continuing process. No less important, though, is the fact that it has to be learned, more or less continually throughout life. As a young person, I marveled at the stories of men and women like George Müeller who managed orphanages in England, Amy Carmichael whose mission was to rescue young girls of India from forced prostitution, and many other evangelists, teachers, and missionaries. A common description of them was that they were “living by faith,” that is, with little or no visible means of support.

It is true that these are great examples of faith, and it’s good to be inspired and challenged by their lives. But that does not make inferior the faith of ordinary people who go every day to a job in the office or classroom or factory. The Apostle Paul writes, “Clearly no one is justified before God by the law, because, ‘The righteous will live by faith.’ " (Galatians 3:11) It takes faith to accept the reality of God’s unseen Kingdom and venture the first few steps in an unfamiliar position. It takes faith to balance oneself on a narrow ledge of life circumstances. It takes faith to attempt things where one could take a hard fall. It takes faith to try something new or believe something new or to learn to act and react in a new way.

Ordinary people living ordinary lives are learning to walk by faith too!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Things Mama Taught Me: "Don't Be Persnickety"

My mother was not one to have freshly-baked cookies ready with a glass of milk after we got home from school. She said if we were really hungry, we could eat bread and butter. (What wouldn’t I give now for some of that homemade bread and fresh-churned butter?) She had to remind me sometimes that I was being fussy, critical, and hard to please because I wanted something really good to eat! I was being persnickety.

We are not born contented. Since we are related to Adam and Eve, we have their tendency to want what isn’t readily available or even what we are not supposed to have. From earliest infancy we are able to make our wants known—loudly and often. Only when we are older, and sometimes not even then, do we learn to be grateful for what we have.

Contentment is a particularly becoming quality for Christians to develop. In a society where media-driven grasping might be considered the norm, the person who recognizes and appreciates the good gifts that God has given is a lovely contrast. The writer to the Hebrews urged them, “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." (Hebrews 13:5) What he (or she) was saying is, “God is enough.”

A Sunday School teacher once asked her class of young children if any of them could recite the entire 23rd Psalm for the class. Several raised their hands, among them a very small girl, perhaps four-years-old. The teacher was a bit skeptical, but invited the little one to try. Standing to face the class, the little girl said, “The Lord is my shepherd, and that’s all I want.” She was finished and sat down! Like the writer of Scripture, she was saying, “God is enough.”

The Apostle Paul explained that this is something that must be learned, since it does not come naturally. “I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:10-13) The secret of satisfaction, Paul learned, was in Christ. He could be content in any set of circumstances because he was relying on the strength of the Lord.

We sometimes quote Paul when we are dealing with a difficult person or an unpleasant job situation or a shortage of resources in some area of life. “I can do this,” we say. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” No harm comes, I think, of using that verse to encourage ourselves. Remember, however, that the Apostle was speaking specifically about being content. Sometimes we just need a little extra help from God in order not to be persnickety!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Love Wins

For much of my adult life, I had some grave misconceptions about love and its influence on people around me. Barely out of my teens, I was headed bravely out into the world of classroom teaching, thinking much as Maria did (the novitiate turned nanny in The Sound of Music). “I will be firm but kind and all those children, heaven bless them, they will look up to me and mind me.” That was the first major upset, followed by a number of other life experiences, when I found love “didn’t work.” And the reason I was surprised and disappointed is that I thought love would produce a positive, expected outcome! After all, hadn’t I read in the Bible that “love never fails”?

I still believe that love never fails, but I’ve learned a more realistic view. Love never fails in the sense that Love doesn’t quit. There is not always a happy ending with everyone smiling. Many years ago, in some literature class, I learned Edwin Markham’s poem, “Outwitted”:

He drew a circle that shut me out—
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But Love and I had the wit to win:
We drew a circle that took him in!

There may have been no reconciliation, no deepened friendship, no outward change at all. But Love won anyway, because it was stronger than the other’s anger or distance. “Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful . . . “ (I Corinthians 13:7) It is invincible, because the “other” cannot make you or me stop loving.

Another mistaken belief was the interpretation that I gave to the conclusion of the passage above, often translated as “endures all things.” I took this to mean love puts up with anything, gives everything, and expects nothing. That led me to mistrust my reasoned judgment, ignore my feelings, and discount my plans and purposes simply because they were my own. A better rendering is “endures through every circumstance.” In other words, Love lasts. It goes on loving when things are moving smoothly; it goes on loving when it’s tough going. It is there when relationships bring disagreement, disappointment, or discouragement, and it is there when they bring delight and edification. Love itself is enduring. When we are in the eternal presence of God who is Love, hope will become reality and faith will become sight. Love will still be love. Love wins!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotation is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Is It God's Will?

God’s will, what He desires and plans, is huge! In our limited thinking we sometimes confine it to what I do, where I go, what I say, and is God going to be happy with me or not. God’s will is much bigger than that!

During a very tough time in my life, a number of praying friends urged me to “command” the physical and material aspects of the situation to comply with spiritual laws and produce the desired positive outcome. They insisted that the Scripture promises life (three score and ten years), health, prosperity, and so on. These things, they said, are God’s will for us.

Let me state very clearly that I deeply appreciate these friends. Without their prayers and practical ministry, I would not be where I am today. My faith, however, did not look or sound exactly like theirs. I simply could not say to God, “I know this is what You are going to do,” or even “This is what You have to do.” Instead, I prayed over and over, “God, I know You see me and hear me. I trust You. I don’t know what You’re going to do and that scares me, but I trust You and I’m hiding in You as my refuge. Nothing can bring harm to me here. I may suffer hurt or loss, but nothing—nothing—can move me from the shelter of Your wings.” I have a great deal of love and respect for my friends; just because we don’t agree doesn’t mean I don’t love them! Nevertheless, I am unable to conclude that my questions about what God intended to do eventually kept Him from answering as they thought He would.

In this time of crisis, I determined to search the Scripture to find what is distinctly the will of God. We can extrapolate a great many things and decide to call them God’s will, but if the Bible says, “This is the will of God,” then I can be absolutely certain of that being His desire and intention. I discovered that God’s will is not something that happens to us at all; it is something we do. Surprisingly few Scriptures say, “This is God’s will.” What comprises His will is this: living righteously, having a grateful heart, remaining faithful to Christ, spending eternity with Him. It is His pleasure, often, to give us exceptional displays of His love and care—the long life, health, happy relationships, and the plentiful resources we so greatly desire—but His will, His ultimate plan and purpose, is far greater.

Here is what I found:

• God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin. (I Thessalonians 4:3)
• Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. (I Thessalonians 5:18)
• And this is the will of God, that I [Jesus] should not lose even one of all those he has given me, but that I should raise them up at the last day. For it is my Father’s will that all who see his Son and believe in him should have eternal life.” (John 6:39, 40)

Knowing this has been a great consolation to me. Floods and fire and famine, accident, sickness, and death do not have to be explained as "God's will" or "not God's will." He is searching for those whose hearts and minds are committed to proving that His will is just right for them! “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” (Romans 12:2)

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotations are taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Guilt-Edged Bibles

(No, that’s not a typo!)

There is no shortage of Bibles. What a blessing! We can choose from a score of translations in a number of different languages, and from various bindings in an assortment of colors. We can read the printed page or listen to an audio recording or read an online version.

I searched yesterday for Bibles with gilt edges. One website had 48 different items, another had 86. There were all kinds of Bibles: one a facsimile edition of the Cambridge Geneva Bible of 1591 (the edition carried by the Pilgrims when they came to America) selling for almost $2200. Bound in brown calfskin!! In a presentation box!! With gilt edges!! I also found for sale a Deluxe Gift and Award Bible!! Leather!! Used, showing average wear—but a well-worn Bible is good. For one cent!! And it has gilt edges!!

I was particularly interested in gilt-edged Bibles because of our tendency to make them guilt-edged. Jesus came to proclaim good news. “He came to Nazareth where he had been reared. As he always did on the Sabbath, he went to the meeting place. When he stood up to read, he was handed the scroll of the prophet Isaiah. Unrolling the scroll, he found the place where it was written, ‘God's Spirit is on me; he's chosen me to preach the Message of good news to the poor, sent me to announce pardon to prisoners and recovery of sight to the blind, to set the burdened and battered free, to announce, “This is God's year to act!” ’ He rolled up the scroll, handed it back to the assistant, and sat down. Every eye in the place was on him, intent. Then he started in, ‘You've just heard Scripture make history. It came true just now in this place.’ " (Luke 4:16-21 MSG)

Hope, pardon, light, freedom. Good news! Great news! But all too often we see some bearers of the Gospel treat it as merchandise rather than the “good tidings of great joy to all people” that the angel host announced. The Gospel becomes anything but good news whenever it shackles people with guilt, misleads them with partial truths, or ties them to those who wish to control them. The very fact that we live in a free country where all these Bibles abound, means that anyone at all can claim to be an able presenter of the Word.

Jesus did not speak soft words about such teachers. “Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples, ‘The teachers of religious law and the Pharisees are the official interpreters of the law of Moses. So practice and obey whatever they tell you, but don’t follow their example. For they don’t practice what they teach. They crush people with unbearable religious demands and never lift a finger to ease the burden. Everything they do is for show. . . They love to sit at the head table at banquets and in the seats of honor in the synagogues. . . They love to receive respectful greetings as they walk in the marketplaces . . . The greatest among you must be a servant . . . What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you shut the door of the Kingdom of Heaven in people’s faces. You won’t go in yourselves, and you don’t let others enter either.” (Matthew 23:1-13 NLT) These words of Jesus give us a good standard by which to measure those who would teach/preach from a “guilt-edged” Bible. Be cautious around them, and instead give your love and respect to those who have shared with you the genuine Good News!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture marked MSG is taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group. Scripture quotation marked NLT is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

What Samson Learned about Another Chance

Super-heroes with special powers are hot on the market right now—new ones that we’ve never heard of before, and old ones that we loved when we were kids. The life of Samson recorded in the book of Judges has been the super-hero of Sunday School lessons for hundreds of years. His astonishing strength was not, as we might casually observe, in his uncut hair. The secret of his toughness lay in his vowed relationship to God. Great manifestations of Samson’s power are recorded along with the words, “and the Spirit of the Lord came upon him.” Apart from God, Samson was like any other man. It was his relationship with the mighty God that enabled him to receive, at the crucial moment, the strength that he needed. .

But Samson’s story does not end there. He began to consider lightly his secret of strength until finally he broke his connection with God and his privilege of instant help. When he allowed the conniving Delilah to cut his hair, he destroyed the symbol of his dependence upon God. When he most needed help, it was not there. The Scripture says, “But he did not know that the Lord had left him.” So careless had he become of his relationship with God that he lost his strength and was not even aware that it was gone! Nor was just his strength gone—the Lord Himself had departed, and with Him went Samson’s strength and Divine help for his time of need.

But words of great hope are written of the blind and imprisoned Samson. “The hair on his head began to grow again.” So all was not lost! Samson returned to his vow, renewing the obedience required by the relationship he had with God. In the final crisis of his life, he acknowledged his dependence on the Almighty. “O Sovereign Lord, remember me. O God, please strengthen me just once more.” Bracing himself against the central pillars of the temple, he pushed with all his might, causing the destruction of the building and all those in it—including Samson himself. While in shackles, Samson had returned to the God of mercy, readying himself for the hour of need. And then, when this moment came, Divine help was present.

We are not able to look ahead into our future, and see just when our great hour of need will come. If we look closely at Hebrews 4:16, though, we may see that there is more to be gained in an encounter with God than help for the present hour alone. “So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.”

Certainly there is grace to help now, in this moment. But in asking for mercy, for the compassion and forgiveness of the Father, we are establishing a relationship with Him. Then in time of need—perhaps now, perhaps later—there will be grace to help us. Of course, grace is not actually accumulative. It cannot be hoarded, stored up for the day when we might need it. Yesterday’s blessing and strength are not sufficient for today, nor can today’s portion be extended for tomorrow’s need. However, our relationship with the Source of grace and help can be—must be—established and maintained and strengthened. It is that relationship that makes grace instantly available when needed.

Come to the Throne of Grace, obtaining mercy and refreshing the inner union of your spirit with God. Then you will never have Samson’s experience of finding that The Present Help is not there.

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotation taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Take Time to Wait

Time is a precious, limited personal resource. There is no substitute for it, and it is non-renewable commodity. Although we talk about “saving time,” we cannot accumulate it in an account somewhere to be withdrawn later. We speak of “losing time” or “killing time,” but we can’t really do that either, because it regularly just keeps appearing and disappearing. We are urged to “make time,” but that is clearly impossible.

What we are able to do is arrange it, utilize it, profit from it, enjoy it—or we can fail to prioritize its use, idle it away, not recognize its value, consider it a liability. The Bible urges us to redeem the time. “Walk in wisdom toward those who are outside [not part of the Church], redeeming the time.” (Colossians 4:5 NKJV) Sadly, many of the modern translations render this as making the most of opportunities, but the use of “redeem” is significant. The Greek word means to buy up something out of the market so as to make a profit from it. When we buy something, we have to give up something—money, labor, whatever meets the seller’s price. Redeeming time, then, implies that we have to determine what is worth giving up in order to release the time for something we consider more valuable.

Because we place such importance on time, we often feel that waiting is a useless waste of it. I’m not talking about waiting for a slow-moving freight train to clear the intersection, or waiting for our turn in the doctor’s office—although those occasions do not have to be spent aimlessly either. I am thinking of waiting for the time to be right for our taking a certain action, waiting for circumstances to be readied for the opportunity we need, waiting for God to do something! We get frustrated and impatient, because according to our schedule, things should have been done yesterday!

Perhaps we need to re-think waiting, not as a waste of time, but as an investment. Jesus was trying to explain the Kingdom to His listeners in the synagogue. "How can I picture God's kingdom? It's like yeast that a woman works into enough dough for three loaves of bread—and waits while the dough rises." (Luke 13:20, 21 The Message) Quietly, slowly, but very dependably, the “starter” that the homemaker mixes with the other ingredients works its way throughout the dough. She does not try to hurry it by beating it; she does not give up and throw the mess out. She waits while something happens inwardly.

Much of our waiting for help, for opportunities, or for answers can be experienced as inner growing time. It is not to be ignored or scorned or hurried. We can redeem (buy back) the waiting time by giving in exchange our anxieties, our preconceived ideas, and our desperate haste. Then we will see Kingdom values permeate the whole of our lives, a result well worth the wait!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture marked NKJV taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Scripture marked The Message taken from The Message. Copyright © 2003 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

I Hear God Singing

Sometimes I think God is singing. Oh, I don’t actually hear any music, but if Walt Whitman can hear America singing with its “varied carols,” surely I won’t be taken away for mental competence testing if I think God is singing!

I hear Him with my heart. Some mornings He comes by while I am sitting quietly, and He’s humming—as I do when I am busy with laundry or dishes or gardening. He lets me know He’s just checking on me, seeing if everything is okay, as any good Father would check on his child.

No, my mind is just fine! The Bible tells me that God is singing. “The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." (Zephaniah 3:17)

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®. NIV®. Copyright©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

The Apple of His Eye

"Be careful little feet where you go,
Be careful little feet where you go.
There’s a Father up above, and He’s looking down in love.
O be careful little feet where you go.”

I sang that many times as a child. Although, I don’t think it was intended to scare little girls, it wasn’t much comfort to me that God was looking at everything I did and said! Of course, I have a much better understanding now than I did then of what it means to have God watching me. Speaking to the people he had led out of Egypt, Moses recited the words of a song reminding them of all that God had done for them. “In a desert land he found him, in a barren and howling waste. He shielded him and cared for him; he guarded him as the apple of his eye.” (Deuteronomy 32:10 NIV)

Although some other verses with the expression, “the apple of his eye,” have differing meanings, the use here is of particular interest. The original Hebrew is 'iyshown 'ayin (אישון עין), and can be literally translated as "Little Man of the Eye." This may refer, some writers think, to the tiny reflection of oneself that one can see when looking directly into another person’s eye. So when God looks at me, does He see a tiny reflection of Himself? I think so, for the Scripture says that when we look back at God, that changes us. “So all of us who have had that veil [ignorance of the gospel of Christ] removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image.” (II Corinthians 3:18)

I heard an interesting piece a few days ago about the Large Hadron Collider near Geneva, Switzerland. This enormously powerful particle accelerator, when it becomes fully operational, will be the most powerful machine of its kind in the world. It is designed to smash subatomic particles together, to help physicists better understand the basic building blocks that make up the universe. Subatomic material can appear as solid objects, particles, or waves and get this—observation of them changes their behavior. The introduction of some form of energy (light, for example) causes a change in the position or momentum of the “quanta.” It’s pretty hard to study something that changes because you are studying it!

But, you know, that’s exactly what happens when God watches us! Unlike the subatomic particles, we have a will and can make choices. If we are responsive to God as He observes us, He makes us more like Himself. God is looking at me! I am the “little woman” of His eye! And He is changing me to reflect His image more accurately!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotation is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Things Mama Taught Me: "Tell the Truth"

On Being Honest with Myself

My mother was an honest woman. When I was a youngster, she told me she’d rather die than live a lie, and she maintained that life of integrity into old age. In her declining years, she told the family members who checked in with her regularly, “When you tell me it’s time to move to Sunny Villa (not its real name), I will go without making a fuss.” So inevitably, the time came when she could no longer safely live alone, and we said, “Mom, it’s time.”

“Oh, I’m not ready to leave my home yet!” she told us.

“Mom, you promised us that when the time came, you would go without a fuss. Do you remember?”

“Yes . . . yes. Well, all right then.” And, true to her word, she went without a fuss. It was not easy for her, but there was no fuss.

So I grew up valuing honesty, telling the truth because that was the example lived before me. There is one person, however, to whom I have found it difficult to tell the truth.

Me.

Sometimes I haven’t recognized the truth, even though it was right there. Through many years of my adult life, and without realizing it, I surrounded myself with people who used me. Organizations that deceived and cheated, that took serious advantage of me financially (in the name of God). Strong leaders who used the subtle power of approval to build a personal following, who controlled my time and my job and my money and my friendships, who ordered my life with should’s and must’s while they covered up their own private wrongdoing (in the name of God). “Friends,” a lot of them, who were only takers because I was so ready to give, who laid unfair claims on me by their unending neediness (in the name of God). Because I was absolutely sincere in my intentions, no one shook me and said “Wake up, girl!” But the time came when the pressure became too great and could no longer be contained neatly. A family member intervened. “This is abuse,” she said, and my façade began to crack.

Over a number of months after that, I began to realize that not only was the present situation abusive, but also that I had permitted, again and again, unreasonable and unhealthy demands to be made on my life. I discovered that Christian women—mothers, wives, friends, employees, members of a faith community—can and must establish boundaries to protect themselves from destructive relationships.

It may be hard for some people to reconcile the teachings of Jesus about love and forgiveness and self-sacrifice with the necessity to preserve one’s health and sanity. I know how difficult that can be; I found it so difficult that I missed making the connection for most of my adult life. Our Lord never intended for loving God and others to exclude self-care. He told His followers that the two greatest commandments were to love God with all one’s heart and mind and strength, and to love one’s neighbor as oneself. It is very hard, maybe impossible, to love and care for others appropriately unless we have a proper respect for ourselves.

Jesus Himself did not minister non-stop to needy people. One time He told all His disciples to come with Him to a quiet place to take a break; they hadn’t even had time for lunch. People were constantly coming and going—people with genuine needs, people who apparently thought Jesus and the disciples should be meeting those needs. (Seeing Jesus’ crew leaving in a boat, the people hurried on foot from the surrounding villages, and beat them to their remote resting spot—but that’s another story.) And once, the Scripture tells us, Jesus was tired from a long walk and sat wearily by a well while His disciples went to a nearby city to buy groceries. So Jesus was not at all insensitive to His own needs or those of His followers. May I put it bluntly? Jesus did not teach His followers to be stupid.

The Apostle Paul echoes Jesus’ teaching. He says, “Husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church.” (Ephesians 5:28, 29) Here Paul makes the simple assumption that people (women as well as men) need to care for themselves. It is just expected. Permitting ourselves to be manipulated by others into caring for them, not along with but instead of caring for ourselves, is not Jesus’ way.

So I am learning to tell myself the truth—the hardest person to whom I must tell the truth.. It is a journey not yet complete. I have shared this much of my story, not because I need catharsis, but because I wonder if there is a reader somewhere who will recognize herself in a part of my experience—and begin to tell herself the truth.

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotation is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Trash in Our Baskets

A friend sent me some kids’ cute sayings the other day. Maybe you’ve heard this one: A four-year-old was heard praying, “And forgive us our trash baskets [trespasses] as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets.”

That brought back to mind an experience of a few years ago. People in the neighborhood were busy raking their lawns, getting ready for the first greening of spring. I decided that the first thing on my agenda was gathering up some of the trash that had accumulated over the winter. So armed with a big plastic bag, I began to pick out the items that had been caught in the clumps of long grass next to the fence.

A plastic bread wrapper. Wait a minute, this is definitely not mine--I don’t buy this brand! Impatiently, I shoved it into my trash bag. A receipt from the lumber yard for eight 2 x 4’s, some nails, and a T-square. I knew nothing at all about that! Part of a paper cup from the ‘burger place, some foam packing “peanuts,” a tennis ball. None of these were mine, I was positive, but into the bag they all went.

I raked under the bushes that surround the porch. Elm and redbud leaves, of course, but catalpa and huge maple leaves? Those didn’t come from any trees of mine! I raked them up anyway, but I started to ponder having to clean up all the stuff in my yard that didn’t even belong to me. What would happen, I wondered, if I just refused to pick up what wasn’t mine?

Obviously, disowning items that became “mine” by default would not be the solution, since ignoring trash will not make it go away. No one was going to come and rake my yard just because the stuff wasn’t left there by me. If I wanted the trash removed, I would have to do it. Regardless of whose trees or habit of tossing litter actually created the mess, it was now in my yard, and therefore now my problem.

So then I began to think about how my spiritual yard gets stuff in it too. There are thoughts that threaten my peace, and snarly attitudes that demand to be given a place. There are tasks that consume more attention than they deserve, and questions that clamor to be heard. My conflicting motivations and my personal temptations all leave something behind. Trash. Clutter. Where did all this come from? I hate to admit it, but this “heart trash” is really mine!

When I go out into the work world or to the grocery store or to the shop where I get my car repaired, I may see and hear things that totally distract me. The clutter can even enter my own living room through the TV or a book or a visitor. A rigorous raking is just what my heart needs—not annually, but often! It must be bagged and hauled off, even if I was unaware that it had been accumulating. Once it comes into my life, I am responsible for its removal, regardless of its origin.

I need to pray often the childish prayer, “Forgive me my trash baskets, as I forgive those who put trash in my basket!”

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

Too Many Voices

I watched a video movie the other evening, a foreign film in which the actors spoke Czech. I had a choice of soundtracks, Czech or French, and since I recognize a few French words—well, after all, my class was at 7:00 a.m.—I thought it might be easier to listen to French. (Wrong!) Naturally, I chose to add English subtitles too. So here I am—I’m seeing actors’ mouths making Czech words, my ears are hearing French, and I am reading English. And I’m thinking, “Wait a minute! There are too many voices here!”

That can happen to us in our everyday world as well. There can be a lot of clamor—not real voices, but persistent thoughts. There is what you are thinking about yourself and your actions. There is what you think you should be thinking about yourself and your actions. There is what you think “they” are thinking about you and your actions. There is what you wish “they” would think about you and your actions. There are other possibilities as well, but that’s enough voices already. In fact, too many.

My mother used to tell me, “You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they do.” (Olin Miller, author) So turn off some of the disconcerting voices, even the overly critical self-talk one. And relax a little as your own “story line” unfolds.

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

What If I Make a Mistake?

We don’t really like making mistakes; we’d so much rather be right than wrong. Most of the time, our mistakes are something we can get over pretty quickly, but sometimes a mistake is life-changing.

I made a career choice—or I didn’t.

I married the love of my life—or I didn’t.

I decided to have another baby—or I didn’t.

I made a cross-country move—or I didn’t.

I got out of a bad relationship—or I didn’t.

I quit the spirit-breaking job—or I didn’t.

You see, life is full of these intersecting pathways, crossroads where decisions have to be made. We sometimes wonder with a little trembling, “What if I choose a path and it’s the wrong one? What if, down the road, I look back and regret this decision? What if I make a really bad mistake?”

Or we may already be “down the road,” and we’re saying “What now, since I’ve made this really bad mistake? I wish I could go back . . .”

There’s good news! God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.” Hebrews 13:5 NLT) Never? Never. Even if I make a really bad mistake? Even if you make a really bad mistake. Another version emphasizes that there are three negatives preceding the verbs. “I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!]” (Hebrews 13:5 AMP) That is a promise sturdy enough for us to depend on.

To be honest, I need to tell you that there may be times in life when no decision seems “good.” There is only doing what has to be done. I will share with you the best example I know, given to me by a pastor friend. A little graphic—but it makes the point.

Just suppose—he said to me—that you are in a terrible car accident. No one has yet come to give help, and now the car has caught fire. But you are trapped, your arm caught in something that will not budge. You know that in a few moments the gas tank is going to explode and then there will be no chance of rescue. There is a large hunting knife on the seat beside you. You grab it, and saw off your arm to free yourself, escaping just before the wreck is engulfed in flames.

Now, years later, you are one-armed. You miss that other arm. You need it. You desperately wish you had it. You think, “Maybe if I had just waited, someone would have come. Maybe if I had waited, then the car wouldn’t have blown up. Maybe . . . maybe . . . “ But the arm is gone. You did, at the time, what had to be done.

Sadly, even appropriate decisions do not guarantee there will be absolutely no second-guessing, no uneasiness, and no regrets. Satisfaction and ease of mind are not always the result when we make the hard decisions; being “right” may bring conflict. But you will never ever be abandoned by the One who said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:4 NKJV)

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Scripture quotation marked NLT is taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. United States of America. All rights reserved.
Scripture marked AMP quoted from the Amplified Bible. Scripture marked NKJV taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com

In God's Viewfinder

For years I have been taking photos with single-use snapshot cameras. That seemed good enough at the time, but when I was preparing to travel this past summer to a reunion with family members, I wanted something better. After having been limited to taking every picture at mid-range with whatever lighting a simple flash provided, the new camera is a lot of fun!

I’ve been thinking about what I saw through the viewfinder or on the LCD monitor while I was taking pictures. I took a close-up of a flower, so near that it fills the whole frame. I zoomed the lens and focused on a little bird at a feeder across the yard. When I took these shots, I got only what I focused on, eliminating nearly all the background. Although I intended it that way, I lost the big picture.

On the other hand, I photographed some large views, setting the camera for the best landscape pictures: mountains, deer at the riverside, even the valley below me from a hot-air balloon! When I took these shots, I got the big picture, but I lost the details. With my amateur ability and my limited equipment, I cannot have both.

Isn’t it amazing that when God looks at us, at our lives and what’s going on in them, He sees the big picture and He sees the details too! He is not limited in His knowledge of what has happened to us and what will happen, and He is just as well-acquainted with every intimate detail of our day-to-day lives. He sees the wide-angle panoramic view of my life and yours, and He sees the close-up too. He’s got us in His “viewfinder” perfectly!

MaryMartha
(All rights reserved)

Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com