Monday, September 8, 2008

Things Mama Taught Me: "Mind Your Manners"

On the Well-Behaved Believer

Some days I got a gold star, some days a blue. And sometimes when I was mostly good but not entirely, my mother put a gold star on my chart but stuck a blue star underneath to shade it on one side. We children were told to mind our manners, and Mama found in I Peter 3:8 a commandment to give her instruction unequivocal authority. “Be courteous.”

Being courteous covered a lot of things, more than I could remember, but my mother created individual charts for each of us. She ruled a card into neat squares, and at the top, in bold blue letters, she wrote the Scripture she was enforcing, “BE COURTEOUS.” Underneath were the days of the week, and the particular courtesies each of us needed to practice were listed in a column on the left. For me these were such things as:

  • Not talking back—and not making a face—when I was corrected.
  • Not fighting with my older brothers about whose turn it was to clear
    the table.
  • Not teasing my younger brothers when they had an accident.
  • Playing quietly while others did their homework.
  • Saying “Please pass the butter,” instead of grabbing.
  • Getting up when I was called in the morning.

Unfortunately, when people become Christians, they don’t automatically become nice! This usually comes as something of a surprise, if not to the convert himself, then to those around him. If she was an inattentive driver before she met Jesus, she will probably be an inattentive driver afterwards! If he was boring before, he will likely be boring still.

This is not to say that the lordship of Jesus doesn’t change the way we relate to people, for it does. But many things we would like to have changed—especially when it comes to the other person’s habits— are not necessarily attendant from the moment of salvation onwards. They are a matter of deliberate attention and intention. A lot of Christian “witness” would be greatly enhanced by heeding Mama’s words, “Mind your manners!”

MaryMartha

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Email: mrymrtha@gmail.com



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